Not a bad week, as first weeks go! Herbology didn't get miraculously easier over the summer, but I like all my other classes so far. Professor Flitwick seems to have some really interesting things lined up for Charms this term; it should be good, I'm excited. Is it overeager of me to have already read the chapter on first aid charms?

Last week (as warned), the night before I left for Hogwarts, Mother brought up the subject of my not having a boyfriend again, and at dinner, of all times. She seemed to think she had a good idea as far as a match goes; I made it as clear as possible that I strongly disagreed with her suggestion. I wish she'd leave well enough alone; I'm capable of getting myself a boyfriend, not that I want one, necessarily. And anyone would be better than <s>Nott</s> her prospective suitor.

Prefects: keep in mind the meeting on Tuesday at 8, please!

Cissy, we need to talk about the arrangement we discussed. I don't think that's going to work.

[Private to Ted]

This meeting needs to go well. They're all expecting a fiasco, and we can't afford to give them one. Please try to behave.

[/private]

The dinner last night went off without a hitch (except for the presence of certain future brother-in-laws, which I couldn't do much about, but he behaved). It really was lovely, even though I kept telling Mother there was no reason at all for it to have been nearly that formal. I appreciate that they're proud of me being Head Girl, but it was almost embarrassing, between the good china and the special-occasion-only silver. It was only Lucy and Patch who kept it from being completely ridiculous - my one complaint was the distinct lack of Sirius. This was the first family event since he left, and I can't say how bizarre it was. (And boring - even if he did almost invariably get everyone all worked up, he kept things interesting.)

But look at me, going on as though he's died - it was just weird, was all. I miss him.

( Private )

[Private to Narcissa]

Cissy, I need to you corroborate a story for me on Wednesday, alright?

[/private]

Evidently being made Head Girl is sufficiently impressive enough to let my parents forgive my "tantrum" last month about Sirius, though I still get snapped at every time I mention him, which is frequently. They can pretend he doesn't exist, but I'm not going to let them forget that he does.

Head Girl, though? I'd honestly thought it would be Alice, not me - she's much better with the younger students than I am, not to mention better trusted. I'm pleased, of course, just...surprised. Very, very surprised. I can't say I'm as pleased about who I'm to work with, though. I'd bet five galleons I lose half my papers in a week; he couldn't keep a shoebox organized, much less an office. A shared office. I really am excited about being picked, but I have a bad feeling I'm going to be spending the entire year listening to every single way in which I'm heartless and evil and so very typically pure-blood. (This, while trying hopelessly to find my belongings, because really, honestly, I've never seen someone so disorganized in my entire life. It's absurd.)

Anyway, there's going to be a dinner to celebrate this Sunday, at the manor - Patch, Lucy, you're of course invited, and I'd really love for you to be there. I know it's a little overly formal, but you know Mother and Father, and it's really rather sweet of them. So say you'll be there, please? It'll make it a lot more fun if you are!

HERE THERE BE OLD POSTS. Nothing after this post counts, I'm just keeping it for rainy day reading.

I never intend to leave such long gaps in my journal, but in my defense, it's all been a bit hectic these last few months. I hardly know where to start.

I suppose the first thing (other than that things with Ted are still absolutely marvelous, but then that goes without saying, I should think) is that I did get into the programme at St. Mungo's, and I've been in training as a Healer since late June. It's amazing, if a little overwhelming at times - this morning I got to help get a teapot off a child's head. (I cannot, of course, divulge personal information, being bound by patient confidentiality clauses. As Healers are. I don't think I'll ever get tired of that word - 'Healer'.) We're still not actually sure how the poor boy got his head into the teapot in the first place, other than that his powers clearly backfired on him. They've still got me working with the more minor cases, but really, that's alright with me for the time being. The more seriously injured patients, the ones who've been in attacks or 'accidents' from You-Know-Who's people, they're the ones who are really past what I think I can

Well. No sense crossing that bridge until necessary, I suppose.

I've got a flat, I suppose that's noteworthy, too. Ted and his family were kind enough to let me stay with them for a bit, which was lovely of them. I have to say I rather adore the Tonkses; they couldn't be kinder, and his sisters are just adorable. It is something of a lark having my own flat, though! It's in London, which is nice, though I do make a conscious effort to keep clear of Grimmau.It's in Bloomsbury, specifically, if anyone fancies dropping by. I ought to give fair warning that it's tiny, but it's mine, you know? That's a nice feeling, and I do love this flat. It's sunny and has plenty of windows and it's quite near the British Museum, which is only one of the million Muggle things I've discovered in the last few months. I've taken to spendy rainy afternoons there when I'm not working; something about all that history suits those sort of days. (There are a few Muggle things I'm not altogether comfortable with, namely cars. If you've never been up close to one, don't. Cars are mad, and they go zipping about at absurd speeds, and there are all these rules for how and when you can and can't cross the roads. I won't get started on buses or I'll never shut up about them. Or the 'Underground', which is this utterly suicidal thing they've put under the whole city. It doesn't seem to bother Ted in the least, but I'd just as soon Apparate. Even walking's preferable to that labyrinth. I tried taking it one day just to see if I could manage, and I somehow ended up on the other side of London.)

It's very strange not going back to Hogwarts this term. I feel as though I'm skiving off class, or something to that effect, and I do miss it, but at the same time...I don't know. Everything's going really, really well just now, despite the war and all. I'm happy. Happy is nice.

[Protected from all but Ted and Patch]

The downside of all this being, of course, my family. I've not heard a word from anyone but Sirius and Alphard since I left school, but I know better than to think they've just dropped the whole thing. If they had it wouldn't have been this quietly, or this easily. I can only assume they're still under the impression that I'll go back or 'come to my senses' about Ted. To be perfectly frank, I rather enjoyed selling all the heirloom jewelry I took with me at Christmas - particularly Bella's. I'd wondered if I would actually be able to part with it if I had to, but after all they've done over the last year, I was glad to be shot of anything involving them. This is my life, now, and I don't want any reminders of them lurking about in the corners. (I've also recently realized that money isn't  particularly easy to come by, so it was also a matter of practicality, but it was still a kind of vindication.)

I know the reasonable thing to do would be to just cut ties altogether, renounce the whole family, and just walk away like Sirius did. I suppose it makes me a bit of a coward for not simply having done with it; he always was braver.

Still. I refuse to let them ruin this for me; it's a clean start, and for the first time in my life I actually get to make my own decisions. Nothing can spoil that, and I really am happy. I think I could get used to this.

[/protected]

 [Private to Ted]

I've just thought of something. (Also it's my office hours and there is absolutely no reason that anyone would need help today. They're all down by the lake. It's a touch quiet in here.) Do your parents know what's going on with my situation right now?

[/private]

4:30 am: Wake up
4:45 am: Revise for Transfiguration @ office
7:00 am: Breakfast
7:10 am: Revise for Transfiguration @ library
8:00 am: Transfiguration NEWT
12:00 pm: Lunch
12:15-??: Revise for Potions in dungeons

 I've been up since four thirty and I don't actually remember how many cups of tea it's been but I'm extremely awake just now

I survived the Transfiguration NEWT and I think it went alright, though I rather doubt it will ever be necessary to know how to transfigure myself to that unrecognizable a degree. It's not as though I'm planning on doing Auror training. Anyhow, it went over well enough, and I've got my nose back to normal and everything. The witch who was giving the practical part of the exam seemed really pleased, so I suppose that's a good sign.

I need to find a place to live. I think I'm going to rent a room at the Leaky Cauldron until I find something, hopefully in London - assuming I do well enough on my exams I'll be starting Healer training in a few weeks. How mad is that?

The Potions exam is tomorrow afternoon. If anyone else who's taking it would care to revise with me, I'll be in the dungeons after lunch working on a few different potions.



 

You know, it's funny. This should all be harder than it has been, but then he says "'Dromeda", and nothing else matters quite so much.

Could anyone in NEWT-level Potions please tell me what the assignment was today? I must have dazed off when Professor Slughorn gave it to us; I haven't got it written down anywhere and I can't remember what he said.

 

[Protected from every Black except Sirius]

I owled Bella after Herbology this morning, not that it'll do much good, but I had to try. This is like playing chess with a half-mad dragon. I hate not knowing when the other shoe's going to fall.

[/protected]

[Private to Alice]

I feel sort of strange asking this, but you know Ted better than anyone, I think, and it's almost Valentine's Day and I've never done this before. Help, please?

[/private]

Gorgeous day, isn't it?

[Private]

I can't believe it! I went in braced for another fight and came out with a boyfriend and it's so perfect. Why did we waste so much time being idiots about this in the first place? He's funny and sweet and gorgeous and kisses really, really well (not that I've a basis for comparison, but it's still fantastic) and my face hurts from smiling, and this is hands-down the best things have been since I can remember. It's just I'm so ridiculously happ I have a Ted!

[/private]

Sorry to any and all prefects (and Ted), but I'm taking advantage of the prefect's bath for the next couple of hours. I've just got out of detention and I'm a mess. Really, I've left black footprints halfway up to Ravenclaw Tower. Filch will probably have a fit, but the longer I stood around trying to get them off the floor the worse it got.

Never question what's involved in cleaning the fireplace in the Great Hall; just appreciate being nice and cozy during meals. I tried just using scourgify to get the worst of it off my clothes, but without much success, I'm afraid. There's got to be a more effective charm for cleaning, there just has to be, and I'm never doing a fireplace without magic again. Managing things like that by hand is just mad.

I have detention with McGonagall tomorrow night at eight. I wasn't paying attention and I accidentally transfigured my goat into a chimera instead of a sheep during class today. McGonagall fixed it before it could do more than overturn a few desks, but it was going for Greta Catchlove's throat, and she had to be taken to the hospital wing for a calming draught. I went by and apologized about a dozen times, but she wouldn't speak to me; I can't say I blame her. I'd be furious too if someone had accidentally set a chimera on me.

[Private to Patch]

I really have been a cow, haven't I?

[/private]

( Private )

Anyone else get an invitation to Slughorn's latest...thing? I guess I should go. That's probably the pureblood thing to do, right? God knows appearances are all that matter to every last one of us, since of course you can count us all the same.

( Private )